blue teevee snacks...
i had a dream.. about serath... and sex in indian mud huts... O.o
strange.
but nice...
......
i love my boyfriend..
jack candy
(serial killer)
....
alex i could stab you in the neck if you so badly wish me to..
i could..
really..
now your just being stupid.. i thought that would have been fun.. dont you.. i do.. dont you? i do!!!.. shut up.. things are okay... you dont seem to be the only one these days boy.. boy.. haha!
that was kind of evil the way i just spoke to myself inside my head..
hang on.. what!??
umm...
numb frum.
hahahahahahah/!!
oh jessica.. . i miss you soo much
....
things are okay latly.. or seem to be okay... or seen atleast as okay..
i dont know..]
i dont feel whole..
(its like that thing jessica does with her arm..)
void..
its seems things are lacking reason as of late..
things dont have to happen..
things arent happening
things are...
things are blowing up in my face..
ive been yelling (screaming even) at my boyfriend when i arrive home from work... for nothing.. really nothing.. and then i cry.. for a long period of time... and i make myself sick.. and i can feel cold liquids all over my cheek.. and i cry more.. and drink more bourbon and smoke more pot...
just like when i was pregnant..
heh.
i have to go..
i really dont want to.
